Friday, October 26, 2012

Pre-Ultrasound Post

Today is a day that I have anticipated for over 4 years now. A day when a darkened screen lights up and a little light is made known to the world--boy or girl, head size, kidney function, heartbeat a blazing. Truman was born just two days shy of his ultrasound. Sterling was 6 weeks away from that event.

Over the past three days, I have had nightmares of people punching me in the stomach, trying to end my pregnancy. I got a stomach bug and with all the throw-up and stomach cramping I thought for sure this pregnancy had terminated. My fears, while I am always working to keep them at bay, have been stronger this week. Stronger because of this force inside me that says I must see this baby. I must make it to the ultrasound.

Three nights ago, Tyler felt our baby move for the first time in any pregnancy. The amount of joy that filled my heart is sure to be doubled, tripled, quadrupled with every new moment of this pregnancy. We are in uncharted territory, and we are here together.

While reading in our regular spot of the scriptures this morning, I was amazed to hear Isaiah "speak" to me, such personal and profound truths:


“Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear; break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail with child. . .
For the Lord hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit.
For the mountains shall depart and the hills be removed, but my kindness shall not depart from thee.
And all thy children shall be taught of the Lord; and great shall be the peace of thy children” (3 Ne 22: 1-13).

All my children. I love all of my children. Perhaps a hint of sorrow will accompany the joy of this afternoon, the sorrow that has carved out the space in my heart to hope anew. I rejoice today. Maybe all of my children will be there.


11 comments:

Ryan said...

Wonderful news Sundy! The Lord knows your heart. Im excited for you both and pray things continue smoothly.

Tam Riley said...

My heart with you both. You and Tyler are going to be wonderful parents, I just know those little ones are waiting anxiously to be here on earth with you two. Sending you lots of love and hope today!

Christy Bateman Mathatas said...

Sending hopes, wishes and prayers your way! So cool that Tyler got to feel the baby!

Patti said...

Beautiful post. I love that The Lord spoke to your heart through the scriptures. Thank you for sharing, for your sweet testimony and words of sunshine.

Heather said...

I was just thinking of you yesterday, Sundy, wondering if the ultrasound was soon. I'll be thinking of you and praying for you!

Marcie Molnar said...

I am in tears! Prayers for you and your family...everyone. <3

Kathleen said...

Enjoy the view and all the feelings that come in exploring your uncharted territory! Thinking of you and wishing you joy, joy, joy.

Bob and Julie said...

So beautiful Sundy!! I got all teary-eyed when I read about Tyler being able to feel the baby for the first time. Your faith has influenced and helped so many of us. I love you to bits and am so grateful you were part of our lives for a little blip of time. I saw your missionary president and wife at a fireside a couple of days ago and we all couldn't stop talking about how wonderful you are. Thank you!!! And, Don't forget Oregon!! =D

Cami Koralewski said...

Sund! I hope the ultra sound goes great!! You are in my prayers! Im so happy Tyler got to feel the baby move!!
-Cami

Emily said...

I have no appropriate words for the happiness that filled me when I read this post. Congratulations. I have been where you are, and you will be where I am.
We continue to pray for you. And we will sing for you too.

Becca Bird said...

Sundy I had no idea you've been through so much heart ache. We are thinking about you and praying for you guys!